The lights go out and I can't be saved
Tides that I tried to swim against
Thursday, December 22, 2011 @ 12:23 AM
Praise the Lord!.

I'm so glad that I feel better now! Yeppers. :D (Still can't really over my crazy obsession with a particular person... lol.) But he accepted my fb request!!! SAY WHAT!? I was literally squealing in delight! Yep, I still can remember the moment when I was waiting for facebook to load, anticipating for any notifications... then I saw "1 new notification" & thought to myself  "what are the chances?" & half-heartedly forced myself to give up! But then the unthinkable happened... like after 6 days or something. Just when I was about to give up all hope... God suddenly surprises me with one of the best possible things! I'm grateful beyond words! :D

Google Sites
Tuesday, December 20, 2011 @ 4:26 PM
Internal Struggle.

So yep another blog post... after godknowshowlong. Anw, I still can't get it out of my head. It's physically and mentally draining cause I've tried so hard to forget, but it just keeps popping into me head. It seriously feels like I'm falling into a state of depression and I can't find any motivation to do anything. Not even eating, which is highly unusual of me. I've been skipping meals alot lately but I don't really feel that hungry or anything, except for my obsession. And it's really frustrating... cause I know I'm being extremely unrealistic. :( The right thing to do is to stop dwelling on stuff that's never gonna happen, but a part of me is still hoping for the impossible. Gosh, my feelings and emotions are so messed up right now, and my heart and mind are not in line.  I know I should get my priorities straighten and do other more "practical" things, but it's not always easy to follow your 'head'. Once again, the constant dilemma of doing what you want and doing what you have to. :/ Arghhh! I really need someone to shake me by my shoulders and wake me up from my "dreamy-Aquarius-y" mode! Oh yay, my life has once again found its way into a pit full of syringes and needles! *recalls the scene from saw*

ps: "it" need not necessarily be a thing. (Just for the sake of anonymity)

Tuesday, November 1, 2011 @ 11:44 PM
I changed my mind.

Hi! So I've decided that maybe I shouldn't give up on blogging altogether. It's actually quite nice to have a personal space for me to express my thoughts etc. ;] So I guess I'll probably update my blog every once in awhile; whenever I feel like it.

Anyway, life has been alright... at times mundane; nothing really memorable happened thus far. Bleh but oh wells, I'm just gonna go with the flow *does the wave action* (lol, I'm so weird) Right now, I just can't wait for PW to be over. It's not too bad when I come to think of it, except that it's draining... very debilitating. On a positive note, it's gonna be over soon. But then there'll be sailing fitness test, which is totally redundant in the first place. Yes, it's probably "for our own good... yadayadayada" but I seriously don't see how running is even relevant to sailing. Ok, I think I should stop now cause I can already feel my blood boiling.